Jun. 28th, 2023

kradeelav: Dr. Kiriko (amused)
“Don’t put it in email,” I say around here, as well as “don’t call bribes chickens.” Here is a paragraph from a US federal criminal indictment (via Intelligencer) that obviously has to be in Money Stuff:

    Between on or about September 3, 2018, through July 12, 2021, JOSHUA TAYLOR transferred 39 electronic payments to PayPal account Twiam@yahoo.com, operated by DENISE LODGE, totaling $37,355.56, in payment for human remains stolen by CEDRIC LODGE from Harvard Medical School. For example, on May 19, 2019, Taylor sent DENISE LODGE $1,000 with a memo that read “head number 7.” On November 20, 2020, Taylor sent DENISE LODGE $20 with a memo that read, “braiiiiiins.”
 
But, look, I understand that advice doesn’t help. You can read Money Stuff all you want; you can know, intellectually, that you should not put evidence of crimes in writing, but when you get to the little memo field in PayPal or Venmo or your checkbook or whatever, and you are buying human brains stolen from the morgue, you will be unable to resist writing “braiiiiiins.” I get it! I am typing this advice, and I have seen the consequences when people fail to follow it, and I have absolutely no interest in ever buying stolen human remains, and if I did I would not use PayPal, but if I did buy brains using PayPal, I would absolutely type “braiiiiiins” in the memo field. “Welp, guess I’m going to prison,” I’d think, as I typed it. The temptation is so strong!

No, you need a systemic fix. Here are some free business ideas:

    An online payments platform that doesn’t have a memo field.
    An online payments platform that has a memo field, and after you type the memo there is a pop-up that is like “are you confessing to, or making jokes about, a crime in this field? Don’t do that,” and gives you a chance to reconsider.
    An online payments platform that has a memo field, so you can type your little jokes about your crimes, but it doesn’t actually record or store or transmit the memo field; the memo field lets you blow off steam without creating evidence.

Like disappearing messages, but for this very specific niche temptation. I don’t know, man. There are just a lot of Venmo/PayPal/etc. memo fields in federal indictments.

via Money Stuff // "Don't Insider Trade While Drunk

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