(no subject)

cracked 80 minutes today drawing with no repercussions, even with rain.

exactly 10 minutes every time separated by an hour, no exceptions. (annoying? oh yes. but infinitively much better than not drawing. all i have to do is make that hour in between pass. an hour is so much easier to blink away than an entire day of nothing; simple rearranging of chores, meals, bathroom breaks. it's also having a pleasant side effect of making me much more efficient at rendering. i can do things faster in 20 minutes than i used to in two hours.)

i feel like i'm drinking in the world again.

tasting the world through drawing. this last ten minutes before bedtime was nothing but the sheer delight of simply drawing the curvature of pillows and sheets on a bed. i'm honestly strangely thankful for the eye/hand issues the last two years because i will never ever take the simple pleasure of drawing for granted again, even if only for ten minutes.

it's... meditative. it's worshiping all the little imperfections of the world.

(krad you are drawing gilf hentai). ...and....?  i don't want to demean the delicious crude lust of it, but that too, has so many wonderful little imperfections. the tug and pull of muscles under skin, how that texture is different than silky sheets... i could go on. i feel like you can tell when an artist appreciates the worlds they're rendering versus when it's a chore, and... i feel that difference.

there's so much i can survive as long as i have my muse and can draw.