(no subject)

[kradeelav]

context: this article covers most of it.

personal reactions: 

* frustrated take: leather has always been and specifically naziexploitation-by-marginalized-creators/uniform kink/taboo fetishes in its roots. you can't separate that from the name or it immediately becomes something hideously, painfully toothless that's an absolute reversal of everything its affiliates have fought for. watch the tom of finland bioptic. read classic leather literature by authors like patrick califta, etc. better people than i have already gone over how complex and nuanced and sometimes tough-to-deal-with these topics are, from an amazing spectrum of people from all walks of life and experiences.

* nuanced-better?-faith-take: organizations don't really do this kind of thing unless if there's multiple reasons at stake. maybe everyone knows information that's not being surfaced (eg, Dehner being an consistent irl ass/physically abusive/embezzlin' funds or boring financial shit) and this is just the least-friction-kind-of-way of separating him from the community at large that's the quickest for the public to swallow.

* cynical take: ... though it sure doesn't sound like it from the way the article framed it, if that's the absolute worst that anyone could surface on him for that long, and he's that apologetic. i personally squint at everyone involved because basically every leather elder has played with uniform kink at some point. the organization's namesake's has entire artbooks of it. i get everyone's rightly on edge, but this ain't it chief.

* unkind take: queer communities really will immediately eject anyone for being the wrong kind of queer/a liability/ that threatens their precious image, huh. i though leather would have been the last bastion for this kind of thing, but I guess not.

* resigned-somewhat-knee-jerk take: yeah i'm done with ""communities"", if i wasn't already feeling that way for a long while. only people i give a shit about in this context is fellow ero-taboo creatives like the nazine circle at this point.

... anyway this kind of thing is why i'm not comfortable giving myself any labels online these days or joining/promoting/etc public groups. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

edit: sent a (hopefully thoughtful) email to the organization from my perspective. this bothers me!

Comments

[flowersforgraves]

I'm also conflicted in many ways, but Dehner has been known to say racist things behind the backs of titleholders of color, especially Black titleholders, and I personally know a Black trans person who was asked not to come back to Tom's House and was told by the person who banned them that "someone high up in leather" didn't want them there. I feel a Fucking Way about the pushback on the ToFF specifically, but he's definitely someone I don't want judging IML.

[kradeelav]

ahhhh so the suspicion for multiple reasons / a longer history (with Dehner specifically) than what was just mentioned in the article was right. frankly all of what you mentioned feels like a far bigger red flag than what was originally given in the article.

very, very much appreciated for the context, this definitely changes things for me. thank you.

[shadderstag]

Watching "kink safe spaces" turn on those at the fringes and loudly cut them out is not the energy I wanted to start 2025 with but here we go. Obviously the American political climate right now is a factor but it is still so incredibly frustrating to watch in real time as people seek out foes they perceive as easy targets - which of course isn't the government and billionaires actually responsible (on top of the patriarchal, classist and racist systemic foundations that America was built on), but rather minorities who express themselves in the "wrong" way - and throwing them to the wolves, rather than standing strong together.

Community means me and the four queers I live with and the handful of weirdos online we've befriended. I'm done trying to play nice with larger "communities" because they always turn on the most vulnerable of them at the first opportunity. I try hard not to be cynical but I'm fucking tired lmao

[kradeelav]

story old as time in some ways, isn't it. that said i'm glad you found your gang; friends and even people-who-aren't-friends who do actually stick with ya and with integrity are so worth it and precious to keep around these days. it's telling when it happens.

(minor caveat that i learned more context about the specific TOFF controversy in the comments, which did change things for me.)