(no subject)
Dec. 9th, 2023 06:16 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kradeelavsurprised at how much i actually enjoy doing comics when it's not original characters :o
i wonder how much my mental block with original characters stems from like.... that low key resentment of that pressure. do not try to make me give a shit about something lmao. i wish i was different but my brain is just broken.
like it alwayyyyyys feels like there's a passive pressure to do originuhhhhl stuff (barf) when you're past a certian technical/quality level. because other people start looking at your work and outright say 'why are you wasting your time with fanart'. when i just honestly wanna be silly with fanart. it's not for selling or conventions or whatever cuz god knows i go full cray cray obsession over the absolute LEAST popular characters lmao.
but like i feel like i *can* be as silly and horny or whatever with fanart especially shit like self insert stuff because you "know""" nobody else but you actually gives a shit. it's marketing-proof. but when it comes to original characters there's a sense of o no it must be ur brand. or you must be marketing them For Something. (and like. i know that's not Actually. the case. but it takes effort to make oc's that feel cohesive/up to my standards of being interested in them at all. because why give a shit. and if i'm going to spend that kind of effort than it just brings in all kinds of other pressure.)
and at this point creative wise i only want to spend sincere effort on (a) dayjob shit that brings in a buttload of dollars for a tiny amount of effort, and (b) stuff i actually genuinely enjoy. it's gotta be in one of those two buckets.
with fanart in the second bucket it's like [points at new blorbo] mine now, let me chew on you like a doggy bone contentedly lol, you know what i mean? 0 initial investment, lots of creative reward. i am simply Too Tired to use brain cells elsewhere.
(...plus i feel like the actual meaningful storytelling shit you can slip in between being semi-intentionally a horny cuckoo ditz makes the sincere stuff hit that much harder.)
i wonder how much my mental block with original characters stems from like.... that low key resentment of that pressure. do not try to make me give a shit about something lmao. i wish i was different but my brain is just broken.
like it alwayyyyyys feels like there's a passive pressure to do originuhhhhl stuff (barf) when you're past a certian technical/quality level. because other people start looking at your work and outright say 'why are you wasting your time with fanart'. when i just honestly wanna be silly with fanart. it's not for selling or conventions or whatever cuz god knows i go full cray cray obsession over the absolute LEAST popular characters lmao.
but like i feel like i *can* be as silly and horny or whatever with fanart especially shit like self insert stuff because you "know""" nobody else but you actually gives a shit. it's marketing-proof. but when it comes to original characters there's a sense of o no it must be ur brand. or you must be marketing them For Something. (and like. i know that's not Actually. the case. but it takes effort to make oc's that feel cohesive/up to my standards of being interested in them at all. because why give a shit. and if i'm going to spend that kind of effort than it just brings in all kinds of other pressure.)
and at this point creative wise i only want to spend sincere effort on (a) dayjob shit that brings in a buttload of dollars for a tiny amount of effort, and (b) stuff i actually genuinely enjoy. it's gotta be in one of those two buckets.
with fanart in the second bucket it's like [points at new blorbo] mine now, let me chew on you like a doggy bone contentedly lol, you know what i mean? 0 initial investment, lots of creative reward. i am simply Too Tired to use brain cells elsewhere.
(...plus i feel like the actual meaningful storytelling shit you can slip in between being semi-intentionally a horny cuckoo ditz makes the sincere stuff hit that much harder.)
(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-11 04:15 pm (UTC)I told her three different times, "He is using it. He's animating a frame a day on an original project." And she pretended not to even hear me! Every time! I guess for her, it doesn't matter if it's original. What matters is that he's not getting paid for it, just doing it for fun and to keep his skills up. Baffling. The amount of pressure and judgment that artists/creatives get is just so irritating. You know, in the past year, he's completed multiple paintings, written short stories, made a comic, did art trades, animated different original and fannish gifs, and produced several zines. But for non-artists that all equals out to literally nothing, because none of it was paid. The only artistic thing he got paid for this year was his film reviews, and those don't count either, because it's "just writing."
(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-24 10:58 am (UTC)Then again, I also have a diploma from a field in the humanities and I've never used it. Oops. :D Your mom's just silly lmao. It's funny, mine's just happy I can prove I'm "smart" XD In fact, she criticizes me for NOT MENTIONING MY BACKGROUND/DIPLOMAS MORE LOL (And she's not of the arts, so imagine.)
(no subject)
Date: 2023-12-24 10:54 am (UTC)This perception is SO fascinating to me because...I feel the opposite! In my experience, always, to note, but--it feels like unless you DON'T do fanart, regardless of your technical level, you just won't be paid attention or taken seriously? I think we've talked about it before or maybe we haven't, but it feels like unless you don't do fanart or are exceptionally lucky, your original work just will not get any attention. Which tracks, right? Fanart of an existing thing, of course people would gravitate to that quicker because it's *known.* But also, like, that was still ORIGINAL work. But ah, it's published very fancily or has a company behind it marketing or has idk the tiktok numbers, so clearly it's to be taken much more seriously than this or that other original work.
(Who me, bitter? LOL)
Like, I got told to make art of existing things to get an audience quicker and it's like but??? what if I don't like the thing though????
That said...I am one of those suckers who sees someone do fanart at a certain skill and think to myself "oh god, but what if you did an original work!" To me (again, must emphasize, personally), it's not really a "why are you wasting your time with fanart" and more "oh man, I want to see MORE from you/I know exactly the genre of story your art would be GREAT for."
I guess sorta a publisher's mindset? :'D Because yeah, it is weird to tell someone that fanart is useless, and to not waste a skill on, when you're presumably following the creative in the first place BECAUSE of their style "performed" for the fanarts in question. I mean, yeah, there's people who unfollow when the fanart of a thing stops coming in and the artist switches to their next hyperfixation--I've done it, I think most of us have done it. But if I really like a style, I stay! And sometimes I really go "man, if I had a company, I know where your skills can be used too." I suppose it's adjacent to how a lot of people working in comics nowadays got their job: by basically doing fanart on their own time XD (And now, we've come full circle!)